mysteries

There’s this little side road that I drive by every day on my way to school that somewhat serves as a dividing line between the country club neighborhood and the row of horse farms.  It slopes slightly uphill and is lined by trees that create one of those really amazing looking tunnels because they hang so far over the road.  Right now the sun comes up in such a way that makes the whole thing kind of glow.  It’s one of those roads that looks like it has to lead somewhere magical.

Ever since the first week of school, I’ve wondered what was down that road.  I always wanted to drive down it, but never really had the time.  Well, a little while back I was running early and decided to take a little side trip down that road.  I drove down it, admiring the beauty of the trees and the way the sun shone through the leaves.  No one was behind me, so I drove slowly as I expectantly approached the top of the hill, and was finally able to see where the road led.

And it led to more suburbs, more cookie-cutter houses with perfectly planned streets and perfectly groomed lawns.

Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate the suburbs.  I grew up there, and it was great.  The uniqueness of a house does not dictate the quality of a home any more than the size of a house does.  It was just so disappointing to be hoping for something magical and mysterious and only find something familiar.

The whole experience made me start thinking about mysteries and adventures.  I’m not an adventurous person; in fact I’m pretty much the exact opposite of adventurous.  I love reading/watching/hearing about other people’s adventures, but tend not to embark on many of my own.  I don’t like open-ended things.  I don’t mind going out of my comfort zone as long as I know I will eventually come back to it.

A friend of mine recently asked me why I’m going to Memphis when it could be possible to do Teach for America in Dallas, where I would be close to friends and family.  He wondered why I would want to go somewhere where I would, at best, just recreate what I have here in Denton.  Maybe it’s for the same reason I wanted to drive down that road – I want to see where it leads.

I don’t want to leave Denton.  It’s completely against my nature to go so far away for an extended period of time.  But despite the fear and the uncertainty, the loneliness that I anticipate, there is something inside me saying “go!”  I know I should be wary of making decisions based on circumstances alone, but my life appears to be converging in Memphis.  There are things prepared for me to do there, and things prepared to do in me there.

Maybe it’ll be a grand, magical, mysterious adventure.  Maybe it’ll end up being something as familiar as the suburbs.  As long as there are tree-lined streets that appear for a moment to be a path to Narnia, I think I’ll be alright.

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3 Comments

  1. hey friend,
    I’m really excited for you and this adventure you will soon embark on. I was struck by your friend’s question about doing something so far away when you could do it where you are. In moving to Philly, I relate to a lot of those feelings you have – about things prepared for me, and things prepared to do in me. Sometimes you can only discover those things when you move out of what is familiar. I hope everything is going well right now, with teaching, and with planning/hoping for the future. With God in control, it is a grand adventure indeed. :-) Many blessings.

    Reply
  2. Emily

     /  December 5, 2008

    how bitter-sweet.

    Reply
  3. kubala

     /  January 3, 2009

    I really like this post. a lot.
    and I like you.
    and your writing.
    and your enthusiasm.
    and your desire to travel mysterious roads.
    I have faith that God will show you more than the cookie-cutter life…

    Reply

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